The ultimate business idea

It's difficult to get employed when you walk on all fours and smell like a dog's blanket. For this reason I often give thought to entrepreneurial ideas. What is the great idea that would elevate me from Regular Yak to Yak Diddy? How will I be able to afford my ticket on Virgin Galactic?

You see, I've always thought that you need to be selling something that everyone enjoys. So let me begin by using myself as the sample market. Here's a list of some awesome things that make me happy:

I enjoy

• Lying in bed all day
• Beer
• Beautiful women (with whom I can lie in bed)
  
• Holidays (during which I can lie in bed all day)
• Fireplaces
• Big screens and free fast Wi-Fi connections
• Beautiful places
• Sport (most, including lying in bed marathons)

It seems to me the answer is obvious. I reckon everyone enjoys most of the abovementioned things. So we should start something that incorporates them all!

• A bar (with a view, to include the beautiful places);
• with fireplaces and big screens with free Wi-Fi connections;
• that is frequented by beautiful women
• where you can bring your own bed and plonk it down somewhere for the day.

I shall call it (said with the tone and enunciation of Dr Evil)... B&B&B&B&B! (Bed & babes & beer & bigscreens & burning shit) Now there's a five star rating.

We'd obviously need some kind of bed delivery service, and a stock of Matie First Year Maidens somewhere in a storeroom in case the other babes didn't pitch. By locking them up we can also help prevent them from eating too many pies. This would count as community service, and help us get NGO funding.

Foolproof. Or for fools. Either way, we have a captive market.

Update: Turns out someone already had a bloody similar idea! B.E.D. is one of Miami and America's top-rated nightspots, and serves drinks and food to you in beds with plush pillows! Looks like it would attract some babes too.

Posted by the yak on Wednesday, November 15, 2006 at 3:39 AM | Permalink | Comments

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